Got Data?

piscesI’ve done an unofficial study of sorts over the past few months and it’s not my first. Just when you thought you knew me.

I’ve done several studies over the years, not that they find their way to a medical journal or get me a Nobel prize nomination, but I track certain things that raise an eyebrow because I feel like it. Interesting indeed I know.

My first study started several years ago when I read that the weakest part of a person born under the sign of Pisces, like me, is their feet. Why is that Lisa?  Well, because the symbol for a Pisces is two fish and as we all know fish do not have feet. If you did not know that, please move along.

Since I just happen to work for a Podiatrist I started to take note on how many patients are born under the sign of Pisces. The answer is … a lot. I won’t bore you with graphs and charts because I don’t like being bored and they don’t exist. 

Another study I’ve been working on is calculating the number of people who have Diabetes and Hypertension, again the answer is … a lot. Notice I keep my data very simple. 

IMG_2658

Peanut on the Left Landon on the Right

My latest investigation of sorts pertains to my two little love bugs Peanut and Landon. It never occurred to me until we got Landon, that Peanut is either gay, highly metrosexual or something else. As if I have all the time in the world. 

These two are the Felix and Oscar of the canine world. Peanut always the serious rule follower and Landon, well he is just Landon.

DATA COMPILED TO DATE: 

HYGIENE:

Peanut, when the slightest bit of dirt is on his paws, he walks directly into the shower stall and demands we cleanse the filth while Landon is under the impression that dirt builds character.

Peanut will then stand on a floor towel like cement until I get the blow dryer out to properly dry his feet and Landon is already out the door running in circles at 90 mph for a more natural approach.

1374748_10201062269823604_1627531393_nFASHION: 

My little Pee Wee also has a serious sense of fashion. Call me crazy, but it is true. This little guy loves to look dapper. While he enjoys sporting an occasional bow tie with his collar, his signature look is the turned-up collar of his coat. He hides behind the chair if I choose a less fashionable piece from his wardrobe.

As for Landon, he wears a coat out of necessity since he is the size of a snowflake and would most likely become popsicle if he weren’t wearing something to keep him warm, he opts for whatever we put on him.

EATING:

Where do we even begin? Peanut waits patiently then walks quietly into the room to approach his bowl while Landon repeatedly checks on the status of his order and resembles a Mexican jumping bean until I put the bowl down.

52e9369dcca10457b7f6b4f2d01e093a02b54ac005e06db49cb32b043ffac6aa (1)DOGS

Peanut is very selective in this department. Oh, he isn’t going to sniff any ole ass no sirree, they must be the right size, shape and color. Peanut has very high standards in this department.

Meanwhile, Landon is all over the first piece of fur that crosses his path. No need for names or numbers, if there is tail … he is all about that ass.

1656308_734562913258998_6816841691317014914_n

I’m starting to see the resemblance …

Conclusion:

Dear Lord …

It occurred to me during the proofreading portion of this post, that Peanut is not gay or metrosexual, he has taken on the characteristics of MY HUSBAND. I feel another study coming on …

Do you realize what that means? I am Landon! A low maintenance social butterfly, who  has been known to jump for food. I’m dying right now!

Life certainly is a trip … Enjoy the Ride!

20 responses

  1. This piece may just get you that Nobel. Or perhaps an if-Nobel

  2. IG. An IG-Nobel. Sheesh. Way to step on a good line.

  3. I see a new advertising sign “The Pisces Podiatrist – we will get your fins flipping again.” Too funny. I love the dog picture you found about opportunity.

    1. Love your marketing idea… I see a future for some lucky doctor.
      I laughed out loud at that photo!

  4. I want to understand this better. Are you saying your husband goes around sniffing asses? Oh my, that’s certainly a conversation starter.

    1. No need to do that anymore since he found this ass …wait, that doesn’t sound right…lol

  5. Thanks for the good chuckle.
    From one Pisces to another, there is nothing wrong with jumping up and down for food.

  6. A fun read. Thanks!

    1. Thanks for stopping by Carol.

  7. Love this!!! I find your studies very interesting… you could write a book of studies with the non-existent stats and grafts, I think it would be a best seller. our dog? Fastidious in grooming (think cat like), will eat in spurts, lately anything near his dish is fair game, other times, he will hold out for a good hefty table scrap (like a whole steak). But, he is 13 and a little hard of hearing and his eyesight is not so good, so let him eat and enjoy! Thanks for this post, it is so good to read your words again.

    1. Thanks Daf! I’m cracking up at the book of my studies….lol

      1. I am telling you, it would be a best seller!

  8. LMAO! I think it’s true that our pets take after us or vice versa or we pick out pets that are like us (or vice versa). Between our two cats, Alexander the Great is very much like Mr. Muse, easy-going, likes to know that food will be provided on a regular schedule, likes a clean bathroom, wants to snuggle all the time and likes to sleep late. I, on the other hand, am very similar to Rupunzel (yes, her name is spelled that way on purpose), I only want attention when *I* want it, I’ll eat whenever I damn well please, I will seek out locations where heat is a guarantee (like the heat vent for her, heated blanket for me), get downright cranky if my sleep is interrupted and the house is NOT on fire, and like to have my hair brushed. Interestingly enough, now that I just had my hair colored yesterday – even our long, luxurious locks kind of match.

  9. Of course you are Landon! Me too.

  10. My wife will be the first to tell you that I’m a Capricorn.

  11. Looking forward to more of your double blind studies. (what’s LMAO? from comment above)

    1. Don’t worry I won’t roll my eyes like my my kids do when I asked such questions. It means: Laugh my ass off, which I’m doing right now.

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